Are You Saying Yes to Things That Don't Fit in Your Buckets?

It's often easy to say "yes," even when we want to say "no." Whether it's agreeing to yet another committee meeting, attending a social event we dread, or taking on extra responsibilities at work, we can find ourselves spreading our time and energy too thin. These choices divert us from what really matters. At some point, we need to stop and acknowledge that time is something we can't recover. In this post, we will discuss how prioritizing your time by creating personal "buckets" can help you reclaim your energy and focus on what truly adds value to your life.

The Power of Saying No

Saying "yes" to things that do not align with our values can leave us feeling drained and unfulfilled. A study found that 60% of people feel overwhelmed by commitments that do not excite them. This mental clutter can cloud our judgment and prevent us from enjoying the things we are passionate about.

Saying "no" is a vital skill that should not be viewed as selfish. Instead, it’s a tool for taking charge of our lives and making intentional choices. When we say "no," we signal to ourselves and others that our time and energy are precious.

Create Your Buckets

In recent years, I've adopted the practice of creating "buckets" for different aspects of my life. This simple but effective approach has transformed my mindset, allowing me to concentrate on what truly matters. Here’s how I define my buckets:

My Personal Wellness

This bucket covers my physical, mental, and emotional wellbeing. When a commitment arises that fails to positively affect my health, I can easily decline. For example, I refuse invitations to unhealthy gatherings that may tempt me with junk food.

My Family

Family is the heart of my being. Any obligation that detracts from quality time with loved ones is a no-go. I prioritize seeing my kids and grandkids as often as possible.

My time with my family is something that I take seriously and I plan out. When your kids don't live close, this takes some strategic planning, but so well worth it.

My Business

I am passionate about my work. However, I must differentiate opportunities that contribute to genuine growth from distractions that merely occupy my calendar. For instance, I no longer attend networking events that did not align with my long-term business vision, allowing me to focus on more impactful things.

My Relationships

Building and maintaining healthy relationships is vital for my happiness. I invest my time in connections that uplift and inspire me. I have chosen to let go of acquaintances whose negativity drains my energy, focusing instead on deeper, supportive friendships.

My Joy

Finally, joy needs a designated space in our buckets. If a commitment does not enrich my life or bring happiness, I make the choice to pass. I actively seek out experiences that inspire joy, like taking a walk alone to the playground and swinging for a bit or planning a spontaneous lunch with a friend.

Eye-level view of an organized workspace filled with plants and a calendar — What goes in your buckets?

Finding Your Own Buckets

Everyone's buckets will differ. What resonates with me may not be applicable to you, and that's perfectly fine! The goal is to establish categories that reflect your values and priorities.

Start by considering what energizes you versus what drains you. Identify the aspects of life you cherish the most, and create your own buckets accordingly. For instance, if travel excites you, make sure to include it in your buckets. Designate specific time in your week for bucket-related activities. By intentionally managing your time, you will likely see improvements in your energy and overall happiness.

90% Energy Allocation: A Rule of Thumb

One insightful rule I’ve come across is to aim to direct over 90% of your energy towards your defined buckets. Sure, life throws curveballs from time to time, and it might be necessary to step outside these boundaries. However, focusing your energy on areas that align with your buckets can greatly improve your overall quality of life.

When faced with requests or opportunities, ask yourself: "Does this align with my buckets?" If you find yourself answering "no," remember that it's okay to decline!

The Benefits of Saying No

Getting comfortable with saying no brings several valuable benefits:

Increased Focus: Eliminating distractions makes it easier to dedicate your mind and energy to what truly matters. For instance, spending more time on your bucket activities can boost productivity by as much as 25%.
Improved Mental Health: Constantly saying yes to unwanted commitments can lead to stress. A survey found that 70% of individuals who began saying no reported a decrease in anxiety levels.
Greater Satisfaction: When you say yes to only what aligns with your values, you’ll experience more joy in those choices.
More Time for Yourself: By saying no, you create extra time for activities that bring you happiness and fulfillment, possibly freeing up hours each week for self-care or hobbies.
Strengthened Relationships: Prioritizing what matters will lead to stronger and more meaningful relationships with those you care about.

Take Charge of Your Time

It’s time to reconsider how you allocate your time and energy. Saying yes to everything can lead to a jam-packed calendar filled with commitments that leave you drained instead of fulfilled. By creating buckets to represent your personal priorities, you will find the freedom to manage your time more effectively.

So, ask yourself: Are you saying yes to things that don't fit into your buckets? If the answer is yes, it's time for a change. Begin saying no to obligations that do not serve your well-being, and focus on what truly matters. After all, time is a precious resource, so make every moment count!